Colleges

Bloganuary writing prompt

What colleges have you attended?

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I have been to 4 different colleges since I graduated high school in 1993. I went right into Davenport College of Business, not really knowing what I actually wanted to do with my life. I left with one class left to finish for an Associate degree in Marketing, which I really didn’t like learning about.

Then I attended Lansing Community College in 1996 for a year and went back in 2003 after getting remarried and adding 2 additional kids to my family making me a mother of 3 children ages 5 and under. I originally wanted to do hotel/motel management then went into Medical Office Administration/Transcription (2 Associate degrees and multiple certificates).

I then got my Bachelor’s in Family Life Education and Master’s in Counseling at Spring Arbor University, Lansing Campus from 2009-2014. I originally wanted to become a teacher, but I have learned in the past decade that there are different ways you can be a teacher. Today, I consider myself a teacher of coping skills for both substance abuse and mental health concerns. I help my clients learn more about their issues and how to deal with them in a positive outlook.

Although there is no life college, I feel that I have gotten an education by living my life. Some of the experiences I have had in the past 40+ years have taught me numerous things, both positive and negative. I learned how to stand on my own two feet after divorce and losing my mom, who was my rock. I learned how to raise 3 kids while my husband was on the road as a truck driver, continuing to go to school full-time and working some of the time. I learned how not to start a business and what I want to do the next time I think about starting a private practice.

Feeling Loved

Bloganuary writing prompt

Can you share a positive example of where you’ve felt loved?

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The example I have where I felt loved was with my kids and grandkids. When my kids were little they were so excited when I would get home from work or school that they would run to me. My grandkids do that now, especially the two older ones (4 and 3), they always want to be with me. I love the attention but at the same time, I would like some alone time.

My mom and grandparents made me feel loved. My mom was my best friend and I knew that no matter what I did I could always count on her for her love and support. I know everyone experiences “love” differently, but when I have experienced it, I felt contentment, accepted, wanted, and fulfilled. My mom was a single parent, but she ensured I had everything I needed and wanted. She kept a roof over our head, and food in the cupboards and she was there when I needed help the most. 

When my son was born, she was sick and she was up at the hospital with me more than my husband was. She was by my side as I welcomed my first child into this world. She made sure that both my kids and I had everything we needed for school, work, and home even when she was severely sick she was still thinking of her family.

When I first held my son after he was born, I fell in love with him, there wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do for him. But when I held my first grandchild, my love was different. I knew that I would lay down my life for my granddaughter. 

As a counselor for the past 9-10 years, I have had clients who have never felt loved by their parents, spouses, children, or other family or friends. They don’t know what love is or how it feels to be loved and cared for. Most of my clients don’t even love themselves because of things that have happened in the past and my goal with them is to help them learn to let go of the past and learn to love not only themselves but their friends and family.

My hope is that everyone can feel love either with someone in their lives or with self-love. In my opinion, love is life, family, friends, and the things that you are passionate about. 

Reducing Clutter

Bloganuary writing prompt

Where can you reduce clutter in your life?

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How can I reduce the clutter in my life? I am in the process of going through my storage unit and getting rid of things I don’t want, don’t need, or that is no good. I have also been going through things in my apartment. 

Another way of reducing clutter is to remove the toxic people in your life. Clutter doesn’t always have to mean things or items, it could be people. As a substance abuse counselor, I have advised my clients to change their nouns (people, places, or things) to be successful in their recovery.

There are websites that can help people organize their homes and what they have and there is a touch once rule. You touch something only once and then no more so you have to decide right then if you are keeping it or throwing it away.

Online Communication

Bloganuary writing prompt

In what ways do you communicate online?

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So how do I communicate online…I use Facebook, Messenger, email, Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn, and Pinterest. I am mainly on Facebook and Messenger. I use email for both my professional and personal life. I am also on WordPress for my blog.

When I post on Facebook it is usually about the grandkids, venting about something, or sharing recipes or games. Sometimes I think I spend more time online than I should, but it is one way I can connect with family in other states.

Favorite Animal

What is your favorite animal?

I would have to say my favorite animal is a cat. I have 3 male cats right now, which is down from the 13 I used to have.

My boys are 5 (KitKat), 4 (Big Foot), and 3 (PJ). They are all related as KitKat is both of their fathers and the other two are half-brothers.

I enjoy cats because when they want attention they will let you know and all you have to do is keep the litter up and they are happy. I do enjoy dogs, but with my health I am not able to walk them. The difference is that dogs are excited to see you at the end of the day when you get home and the cats don’t really care.

My Most Memorable Road Trip

Think back on your most memorable road trip.

I would have to say my most memorable road trip would have been the 3 summers I went on the road with my ex-husband.

He was a truck driver and I needed to get away from the kids so I spent 3 weeks living in a semi-truck going from state to state.

The first year, I was so excited that I was up in the front and took pictures of everything. I had so much fun going to different states and experiencing life on the road. It was different from being a full-time mom and student but it was a much needed break from single parenting.

The second and third year, I was still excited but I spent more time in the sleeper than I did the year before. I used this time to work on my writing and just relax and focus on my mental health.

My Mission…

What is your mission?

What is my Mission? I believe my Mission is to be the best counselor and mother/grandmother I can be.

As a counselor, my job is working with individuals that are dealing with substance use disorders along with mental health issues. I use my education and experience to help my clients find their purpose in life and learn how to deal with their addiction and what caused their addiction.

As a parent/grandparent, my job is to support my children and grandchildren to the best of my ability. I have 3 adult children and 3 grandchildren with 1 on the way (will be here in June 2024). I try to spend as much time as I can with my children and grandchildren to the point where my self-care is usually put last.

I even have a mission to myself. I have to make sure I schedule alone time and self-care for not only my physical health but my mental health. I have learned that if I focus on work or family and not spend any time on myself I will experience an increase in depression, irritability, and restlessness. So I am trying to make 2024 the year I focus on my self-care. I am planning on taking 1-2 days a month off of work just to rest and relax. I will put the phone on Do Not Disturb and just spend the time I need to with myself.

So what is your mission in life whether personally or professionally?

New Project

Hi everyone…Happy September. It is hard to believe that the year is over halfway gone. It feels like it was just January and here it is September. Why does time have to move so fast these days?

I wanted to ask for help with a new project I am working on. As many of you know if you have been reading my blog for a minute, I am a Substance Abuse Counselor. I have decided to combine my two passions: writing and addiction. I am going to be working on a book that is going to explain addiction and current research.

I would like to have a chapter in the book where I tell stories of those in recovery and survivors of family members who have overdosed. I believe this book will help end the stigma of addiction and explain it better for those who don’t understand it.

In my five years working in this field, I have lost about 10 previous clients to overdoses or deaths caused by the use of substances that interfered with other body systems. I have dealt with my own grief and wished there was something else I could do. I have heard from previous clients that their family members don’t understand their addiction or if they are on Medication Assisted Treatment (suboxone, Vivitrol, or methadone) they are just trading one substance for another.

So my goal with this book is to provide insight to those in all stages of recovery and addiction and current research about addiction and treatment, along with resources of where to go for help.

If you would like to contribute a story or any advice for others in recovery please email me at darlacarmoneyllpc@gmail.com and put “Addiction book” in the subject line.

Reblogged from GS — Finding Inner Calm: A Simple Exercise to Help You Manage Stressful Situations

Finding Inner Calm: A Simple Exercise to Help You Manage Stressful Situations

Most productive

When do you feel most productive?

I think I feel the most productive in the early to mid afternoon. I am finally awake and in the groove at work but by the time I get home about 430 I am tired and wore out that all I want to do is sleep.